Giving thanks November 29, 2018

Published by the Times-Georgian – November 18, 2018

http://www.times-georgian.com

by Joe Garrett

 

Well, the cold weather is back and it’s time to overstuff our bellies with turkey and dressing.

I feel sorry for those folks who mix turkey with stuffing. Thank God for a pan of dressing, cranberry sauce and anything else that doesn’t require cooking inside the turkey cavity. We’re only two weeks into the time change and my dog still doesn’t understand it’s a sin to wake me up on a Sunday morning while the roosters are still snoring.

In the meantime, there’s always room to give thanks. So, here I go again in the late Atlanta Journal columnist Furman Bisher’s journalistic style and say thanks for—

The person who created the leaf blower.

The smell of fresh cut split wood ready for burning in a fireplace.

Football teams that run the ball.

When I turn on the radio and there’s an old Jim Croce song playing on the airwaves.

Times when it unexpectedly starts raining and there aren’t 10 pieces of pine straw stuck underneath my windshield wiper blades.

Light bulbs that actually work for longer than a week.

When I turn on the television to watch The Andy Griffith Show and it’s any episode broadcast in black and white.

Little children who ask a million questions and want to hear a good story.

Hot water, hot chocolate and hot dogs—in no particular order.

A grocery cart that doesn’t have a bad wheel.

Drivers who flash their bright lights while traveling in the opposite direction to warn you to slow down because a police car awaits on the other side of the hill ready to give you a speeding ticket.

A traveling coffee mug with a handle.

Church bells, old folk tales, boat sails and good music that never fails.

Legos, Thomas the Train and all of the toys that hurt when my wife and I step on them knowing our children won’t be little forever.

And for all of you who read my column each week and never hesitate when we meet in the grocery store to say, “That column last week wasn’t near as good as the one from the week before.”

May you all have a Happy Thanksgiving and heed the words of the late Mr. Rogers when he reminded us all from his neighborhood to remember “the greatest thing we can do is to help somebody know that they’re loved and capable of loving.”

Selah.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Supermarket shuffle November 29, 2018

Published by the Times-Georgian – November 11, 2018

http://www.times-georgian.com

by Joe Garrett

 

I decided to grab a big cart.

As usual, the magic doors opened and I wheeled into Publix as two employees greeted me.

“Are you hear for the free tastings?” one man asked.

“No,” I replied. “I’ve got to pick up some cheese.”

My kids had devoured every slice of American cheese from our refrigerator and we needed to stockpile to combat hunger. I’m still not sure if it’s actually cheese, but there’s nothing better sandwiched between two slices of bread, and grilled in butter to perfection.

“Would you like to try one of our granola samples?” the employee asked as I passed her while walking to the deli counter. “We also have our organic apple juice if you want to try.”

I accepted her offer, and the freeloader in me began to emerge.

Once again, I broke the cardinal rule of grocery store shopping. Never enter when you haven’t eaten lunch.

“Would you like to try some of our delicious Boar’s Head ham or turkey today?” the young man in a hair net greeted me as I approached the deli counter.

“No thanks,” I replied. “I only need cheese.”

He began to thinly slice the cheese and then popped the question—

“Would you like to sample the cheese?” he asked.

“Oh, sure,” I answered. “Why not?”

It’s hard to walk into the grocery store and grab one thing.

“Why did you grab a big cart?” the angel voice in my head said to me quietly.

“Because he’s a sucker for grocery stores,” the devil’s voice in my head replied. “I bet he doesn’t leave the store for less than $100. Bahahahaha!”

“May the force be with you,” the angel whispered as I moved towards the meat counter.

My timing was perfect as the meat man pushed a cart and began to unload cellophane packages of freshly ground beef chuck. Suddenly, I had a vision of juicy, melt-in-your mouth cheese burgers on the grill mixed with grilled onions and started to daydream when another Publix employee interrupted me.

“Would you like to try a sample of our meat loaf and mashed potatoes?” she asked. “It’s really good.”

Once again, I accepted the offer.

My wife is a master inside a grocery store. She knows every inch of every aisle and can zoom in and out faster than green grass through a goose.

She knows when I go to the grocery store, I’m off like a herd of turtles.

I don’t know why, but I can stay in a grocery store for hours and never be bored. Although my initial mission was to pick up a pack of cheese, by the time I made it to the frozen section my cart was full of ground chuck, asparagus, russet potatoes for baking, cheese, loaf bread, pound cake, coffee cream, hamburger buns and lord know what else.

For what felt like hours, I stared at the rows of ice cream. Half of the flavors I couldn’t pronounce and I still don’t understand why people buy low-fat ice cream. The row of Jeni’s Ice Cream caught my eye and I decided to purchase the Brown Butter Almond Brittle pint and selected Popcorn! Peanuts! ice cream—yes, I said popcorn—as the other choice.

Finally, it was time to check out.

For a moment, I gazed at the magazines. The stories ranged from how to lose 20 pounds before Thanksgiving to “Shocking Secrets—The Golden Girls—Their Vicious Backstage Feuds.” I decided to skip the Golden Girls article. There’s no doubt Bea Arthur would probably whip us all if ever in a fight.

The cashier slid each of my items across his scanner and a two minutes later I heard the magic words—“That’ll be $104.32.”

I shook my head—and the devil laughed.

A broad-winged message November 29, 2018

Published by the Times-Georgian – November 4, 2018

http://www.times-georgian.com

by Joe Garrett

 

The waitress poured another cup of coffee.

 

In a few minutes I’ll go to war with the health gurus and I’ll fight this battle on the grounds inside a Cracker Barrel. Who needs a fruit smoothie or protein shake when you can add 1,000 plus calories?

 

I ordered pancakes with hot maple syrup, two scrambled eggs, hash browns and a sampler of crisp bacon, smokehouse sausage and country ham. God bless the swine.

 

The menu calls this meal Grandma’s Sampler. Although I never knew the Cracker Barrel Grandma, I think we probably would have had a lot in common.

 

It’s early and the crowds have yet to arrive. Two tables across the room are full of old folks. The wives sit on one side of a big round table and their husbands on the other. Thanksgiving is already a topic for the womenfolk while the men practice politics. Within an hour, the world’s problems will be solved.

 

Too bad members of Congress aren’t sitting nearby.

 

“Y’all want another biscuit?” the waitress asks the men.

 

“They don’t need no more biscuits,” one of the wives demands as their husbands shake their heads in defeat.

 

The waitress laughs. Thank God for strong women.

 

I don’t really know why I’m here except to have a moment alone and eat a big breakfast. The last few days have been extraordinarily heavy. Six years have now passed since we buried my son Will and the pain never goes away. And last week we moved my mother into hospice care. She’s not knocking on Heaven’s door (at least not yet). We know her battle with Alzheimer’s will eventually not last forever and hope whenever her time comes (whether it’s six weeks, six months or another year), she will go peacefully.

 

I wish I had answers to life’s biggest mysteries. No one will ever truly know why do bad things happen? All I know is there’s still a lot of good in this world.

 

“Can I bring you another little bottle of hot maple syrup?” the waitress asked me as she walked by my table.

 

“No thanks,” I replied.

 

For some strange reason, a broad-winged hawk keeps visiting my family at home lately. The first time he appeared, he startled my wife when she noticed him on top of my son’s car. A few hours later she walked outside and once again saw the creature. This time the giant bird appeared on top of her car.

 

The hawk obviously loved our yard because hours later after my wife picked up our children from school, he surprised her for the third time in one day when she noticed him perched on top our basketball goal.

 

Like my wife, I eventually encountered the hawk 48 hours later when the bird visited me for the first time. I looked into a tree in my backyard and there he settled. For a moment, we eyeballed each other and then I crossed my fingers he wouldn’t fly towards me and pluck my gray hair.

 

Finally, two days later the hawk appeared again when he flew across the yard after I parked my car in the driveway.

 

“What’s his deal?” I asked myself. “Why does he keep coming back, especially at this time of year?”

 

“Many spiritual teachers believe hawks are messengers,” according to the website http://www.powerofpositivity.com. “Seeing them definitely means the universe wants you to learn powerful lessons or expand your knowledge and wisdom. Hawks soar high and have the ability to view all of life from this perspective.

 

“Therefore, they represent the ability to look at the big picture, and not get too wrapped up in the petty details of things,” I continued to read. “If you see hawks often, this might mean that you need to deepen your focus on tasks at hand and not allow yourself to get distracted by the smaller details of life.”

 

In these heavy days, I’ll take the hawk as a sign. Why not?

 

We can never go wrong looking at the bigger picture and focusing on what’s really important. The day-to-day stuff will do what it’s going to do. There are some things I can control and a whole lot more areas I can’t. In other words, maybe it’s time to soar to a higher level of thinking and say “aye” and not “nay” when life opens a new door. I think I’ll do that.

 

“Here’s your check,” the waitress says as she stops again at my table. “Don’t be in any rush. Would you like another cup of coffee before you leave?”

 

“Yes,” I said. “I think I will.”

Just the facts November 29, 2018

Published by the Times-Georgian – October 28, 2018

http://www.times-georgian.com

by Joe Garrett

 

It’s easier to see when you take a leisurely drive through the Georgia country roads.

I despise driving on interstates even though they’re often the fastest way to a destination. If I have a choice (usually I do), I love to take the scenic route through small towns, especially those most likely to have a man dressed in overalls selling produce on the side of the road from the back of his pickup truck.

In the last year or so, my trips have taken me through various small towns in Georgia from Elberton to Royston, Plains to Americus, Rockmart to Cedartown and many more. The smaller rural areas in between these drives paints a picture of our state with towns as different as salt and pepper.

The one thing that stands out while driving through these Georgia towns is the vacant store fronts and often empty buildings of once thriving industries that either failed or packed their bags for the holy grail in larger cities. It’s no wonder so many of Georgia’s rural communities are struggling to find physicians who want to move and practice there.

Even Carroll County is vastly different from city to city. Carrollton is an outlier (in a good way) from other Georgia cities as our downtown is thriving with stores and restaurants, great schools, the GreenBelt and industries that provide vast employment opportunities that give us a great place to work, play and live. It’s scary to think what would happen to our town if we ever lost our largest employers, or for that matter—even our small employers like Big Chic.

Recently, I listened to Carroll County Commission Chairman Marty Smith and Sheriff Terry Langley address the Rotary Club of Carrollton regarding the upcoming vote on the 2018 Transportation Special Purpose Local Option Sales Tax (TSPLOST). I’ve always felt empathy for those in leadership positions when they discuss taxes. It’s never easy.

Let’s face it—without taxes we wouldn’t have our roads, our law enforcement officials, our schools and so much more. In other words, it takes money to operate a government. On second thought, it takes a whole lot of money to operate a government.

I believe local government can be good, especially the ones that recognize the importance of adapting the philosophy from the movie Shawshank Redemption which teaches us to either “get busy living” or “get busy dying.” No one wants our community to turn into empty storefronts and closed manufacturing plants.

“Protecting and improving our community’s infrastructure is crucial to its livelihood,” said Chairman Smith. “This is especially true when it comes to roads. Having quality streets and highways for residents and visitors to travel on is essential. The key is doing so without overburdening the taxpayers.

“Now there is a solution that’s fair, effective and will make the county safer,” continued Smith. “With TSPLOST, it isn’t just property owners bearing the burden. Everyone who spends money in Carroll County will be contributing. Approximately 40 percent of all sales in the county are from non-residents.”

Some other points include:

• TSPLOST is a sales tax specifically for transportation improvement such as paving, resurfacing, bridges, signaling and striping of streets and roads that will make the county safer.
• It costs $140,000 per mile to grade and pave a new road; $80,000 per mile to resurface an existing road; and $5,000 per mile to stripe a road.
• All cities and the county will participate with each setting its own priorities. TSPLOST will allow $16.5 million in new funding each year for cities and the county to spend on transportation improvement. This totals $82.5 million over five years.
• Property tax is currently Carroll County’s largest source of revenue. Adding a penny to sales tax is the equivalent of 3.5 mills of property tax.
• TSPLOST will not be added to purchases of motor fuels (cars, trucks, etc.); prescription drugs; current farm exemptions; exempted food items; and vehicle purchases.
• These funds could give some much-needed relief to the General Fund. The $2.5 million in General Fund money could be reallocated to address other priorities, such as Public Safety (Sheriff, Fire Rescue, etc.).

“Public safety salaries are a major issue,” said Sheriff Langley. “We have had an increase in the numbers of our quality and some of our most experienced law enforcement deputies leaving for higher paying jobs elsewhere. We need to keep our experienced personnel here.

“We’re a large county with over 1,050 miles of roads to patrol and maintain,” continued Langley. “Under the current funding, it’s impossible to meet all of our needs without additional dollars.”

The vote will be on the general election ballot on November 6. It’s up to the voters to approve the TSPLOST.

“If passed, collection will begin April 1, 2019 and continue for the next five years,” said Chairman Smith. “TSPLOST equals safety. It generates more money to improve road conditions, address transportation concerns, and allow the county to redirect General Fund money to increase Public Safety wages.”

I suppose those who are against this vote will stick to the ancient old wisdom of “a penny saved is a penny earned.” As for those who will vote yes, I suppose they will stick to the other ancient old wisdom of “a penny—if invested well—can return a whole lot more.”

For a list of specific projects to be addressed by TSPLOST, please visit http://www.carrollcountyga.com.

We’re lucky to live in such a wonderful community that’s thriving better than most. Take a Georgia road trip if you don’t believe me—and don’t forget to vote.

 

 

Raging bull November 29, 2018

Published by the Times-Georgian – October 21, 2018

http://www.times-georgian.com

by Joe Garrett

 

Big Gus didn’t make it.

The big bull welcoming guests to Angelo’s Steak Pit in Panama City Beach, Florida has been tested through numerous tropical storms and a handful of minor hurricanes. Hurricane Michael, which arrived about the same size as South Dakota, delivered a blow to the legendary landmark that bills itself as “Home of the 20,000-pound steer and that’s no bull!”

The pictures from the storm look like a war zone.

I caught my first amberjack off the shore of Mexico Beach, the tiny fishing village that’s now basically wiped off the map. After living in Panama City Beach for three summers during my college years, I’ve recognized several of the buildings and regions destroyed from the monstrous storm.

Even the Bowl-A-Rama, where I once watched local expert Matt Carter almost bowl a perfect game, has been dealt a blow.

It’s hard to view the photos without feeling profound sadness for the thousands of people who are suffering. It will take clean up crews, FEMA workers and volunteers possibly years to rebuild. And no matter how they do, the region will never look the same.

The cleanup has begun.

As Confucius said, “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”

Horrific events have a way of bringing us to our knees wondering if tomorrow will bring better days or perhaps the reality of more tragedy. There’s an old parable that teaches us a bigger picture through these difficult days.

“A man was walking down a trail in a very thick jungle in Africa.

“Ahead of him on the trail he saw a large snake. He could only see the body of the snake lying across the trail; the head of the snake was on the other side of a rock just off the trail.

“The man recognized it as a very venomous snake. The vegetation on the sides of the trail was too thick for the man to go around, so he realized he was stuck. He picked up pebble and gingerly tossed it at the body of the snake, hoping it would move. It didn’t.

“Then he picked up a long stick and poked the body of the snake and then jumped back, hoping it would move out of the trail. It didn’t.

“He became bolder and used the stick to try to push the snake out of the trail. But, it still wouldn’t move. Finally, he worked up his nerve and approached the head of the snake and realized the snake’s head had been crushed by the rock. The snake was dead.

“The man pushed the snake out of the trail and continued on his way, full of hope. His hope didn’t come so much from the dead snake on the trail behind him; there could be more snakes ahead.

“His hope came from knowing that there was someone going ahead of him on the trail—clearing the way, removing obstacles and making it safe.”

In the weeks ahead, we’ll continue to see more photos emerge from Hurricane Michael. In all likelihood there will be more snakes to emerge for the folks who begin to rebuild. While the path may not always be exactly what those suffering anticipate, no one walks alone.

That’s no bull.